Inevitability
by nikole stella
Summary: Sam is addicted to demon blood until Dean comes back from Hell. After a rough hunt, Sam and Dean realize that Dean's blood heals Sam and his addiction. But is Sam willing enough to let Dean sacrifice himself again or will he take the path chosen for him?
1. An Addicted and Twisted Sam

I wrote this on May 27th, 2009 during two class periods and just fell in love with it. It can be disturbing to some, but it's not too graphic. I already posted this but things have changed.

**What's new about this story?: **I decided to write at least one more chapter to this to make it more appealing. I wanted to add Dean in here, so that's why I changed the summary… So a second chapter is on it's way! Dean is in that one, not this first one.

The first chapter is a bit more haphazard (in my mind anyway) in order to mirror Sam's feelings. I promise the next one will be more orderly. This chapter is short too, which is a surprise. Usually my serious stories are long...

Rated T (bordering M) for language, some sensuality, and mild violence (well, I think it's mild...)

Disclaimer: Supernatural doesn't belong to me!!! I wish... But Kripke, CW, and whoever else has the power does.

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**Chapter One: **An Addicted and Twisted Sam

If he just sucked once, just once, maybe the burn would go away.

He sucked at that pulse, just right there, and something just clicked. Everything turned to nothing. Nothing mattered. Only now, right here, what he was feeling was incomparable to anything he had ever felt. It tasted so sweet… So goddamn sweet, (yet so wrong), but so tantalizing (but so wrong), and so delectable (and wrong, it was wrong… IT WAS WRONG!).

But Sam didn't care. This was about him.

He sucked again, and again, and again.

He could hear Ruby moaning, almost panting, but he immediately tuned her out. This wasn't about what she felt. She was using him. Sam wasn't foolish enough to not realize that. What she was using him for, he couldn't be sure. But that didn't matter either because he was using her too. There was no attraction to her, not really. It was what she offered him…

Sam always, **always**, felt unnatural. It was as if only a brief moment of the time he had thus spent on Earth was pure and untainted. He knew it was due to Yellow Eyes. His blood had been soiled from the get-go. Why try and pretend like everything was dandy when it just fucking wasn't?!

But what Ruby had released him. He no longer had to try and delude himself into the hope of a normal life. Gone was his lawyer career. Gone was college. Gone were parties, wild Spring Breaks, sleepovers, going to a job where business suits were all the rage, living in a steady home, raising a family, spending time with his children, dying an old man…

No. Those were gone and Sam got it. He understood now. Nothing could change who he was or what blood ran through him or what he had done… or would do… His life had been set and he had no control over that. But this… This Sam could handle.

He bit Ruby's forearm viciously with his teeth mauling the skin as he sucked harder. Ruby took in a surprised breath and a flicker of pain passed through her face.

"Sam, that hurt," she said… well, more gasped. "That's enough."

This was Sam's domination: his rules, his territory.

He dug his left hand into her other arm and practically squeezed the arm he was mutilating with his mouth.

"Shit! Sam! I said stop!"

Like that was really going to stop him.

Ruby began to thrash around to get Sam off her, but she suddenly became aware of something painfully clear: Sam was stronger than her now. That thought, the epiphany, stole her breath away with a violent shudder. He could kill her… He **would** kill her… She felt truly helpless, something she hadn't felt in a long ass time and didn't welcome now. This wasn't supposed to happen. This wasn't what she fucking planned!

"Sam! I said get the **fuck** off of me!"

He didn't relent and she could feel herself ebbing away slowly… slowly… slooowly…

Then he stopped.

Sam stood up abruptly and gave Ruby a toothy grin. It had to be the freakiest and creepiest smile that Ruby had ever seen. His teeth were stained with blood that also coated his lips and dribbled off his chin. She began to feel dizzy and allowed her vessel to fall asleep.

As she entered that darkened land, she heard Sam say, "I'm only using you for now, you bitch. It'll only be a matter of time before I kill you."

And Ruby didn't doubt it.

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Wow. That was a little intense. Hopefully Dean's presence in the next chapter will help Sam? *crosses fingers* Please review!

And don't worry! Ruby isn't going to be with Sam or anything in this!


	2. When Dean Came Back

_Author's Note:_ Yes! I am back! Sorry. I'm awful and I hope you guys will accept the rest of this story and my upcoming Harry Potter comedy as an apology. And this story is actually pretty much complete. Just two more chapters after this one. Funny, I wrote Part III before Part II. Hehe. Anyway, just a little editing from a few friends and Part III should be up soon!

This one is short… again. But the next two parts are chalk full of words. Whoo! Part III is in Dean's perspective, so prepare for humor and seriousness, yes, of course. In the meantime, it's only serious time, so here you go…

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**Inevitability, Part II: When Dean Came Back**

Sam couldn't believe it. He actually couldn't believe that he did… it with Ruby.

It was horrible, disgusting, degrading… and pathetic. If his former self were to see what he would become, he would have done any and everything to stop the change, to stop the blood drinking, to stop the demonic fornication. Somehow, that last one seemed worst.

Sam glanced at the messy bed and the lump of Ruby in the darkness then quickly faced back towards the window. At least the light wasn't on when they… He shook his head violently and determined to not look back. It was done, over. There was nothing he could do about it now.

'Just move on, Sammy.'

A heavy sigh broke out, and he tried not to go down that train of thought. Thinking about **him** or anything associated with **him** wasn't going to bring **him** back. However, the little innocence of thinking of himself as _Sammy_ caused for Sam's shoulders to sag. The world just wasn't as bright as it once was… and neither was he.

It never really occurred to him that **he** was the one holding him back – from the darkness and subsequent power – until **he** was gone.

Maybe it was for the best. Sam was better at hunting now. He was definitely stronger in character. No longer did he need the support of a brother. He was finally independent… It was for the best that **he **was dead…

Sam began to laugh bitterly but quickly stopped the sound; it was so ominous in the silent room. He sounded almost deranged. Another sigh, softer this time, came out. Sam knew… He just knew that despite what he just thought, he missed **him**… He missed Dean.

A rapt set of knocks came from the door and for some wild, insane, and too hopeful reason, Sam believed that that it was Dean who just came back from the nearby gas station and forgot the card key to the room. He could even see Dean holding unhealthy snacks and grinning like a Cheshire cat. His vision cleared when Ruby noisily got out of the bed, quickly put her matching black panty and bra, and hissed at Sam to "Go answer the damn door!"

A few heavy footsteps later, Sam cautiously looked through the peephole and saw… Bobby. Relief and disappointment washed over him, and he opened the door to greet his old friend. However he stopped his forced smile when he saw Bobby's demeanor. It was worn and tired as usual, but there was an unexpected energy (whether nervous or excited, Sam couldn't tell) radiating from Bobby.

Sam's eyebrows furrowed and he asked, "What is it, Bobby?"

Bobby just stepped aside and revealed someone who Sam thought but never felt was dead. It was someone who would take all away what he earned and hated yet loved with a sick twist.

Sam shakily asked, "Dean?"

Dean smiled widely and at that moment, Sam went blank.

* * *

*As time went by....*

Dean couldn't believe that he just saw his brother's face covered with –

"Demon blood! What the fuck?! Sam, what the fuck were you thinking? Nothing?"

Sam didn't answer.

"That's what I thought."

"Dean, I –"

"You know what, Sam? Don't try to explain it. Don't try to give yourself a fucking excuse for this!"

"I was doing this for you!"

"The hell you were! You are doing this for revenge, Sam."

"Why don't you believe me? Come on, Dean! Just tell me, and maybe we can fix this."

Dean's eyebrows seemed to rise above his hairline. "Are you serious? You think that we can just 'fix this'?"

Then Dean laughed. And laughed some more.

He grabbed his keys and beaten leather jacket from the table and opened the motel door.

"I'm getting a drink."

And just like that, Sam knew that the conversation was over… for now.

Like all other Winchester conflicts, they would just put it to the side until everything would blow up. Dean would act his badass self. Sam would continue being the calmer if more unstable part of the duo. And things would be back to normal, if only for a while.

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_Author's Note: _Good? Bad? Horrible? Please tell me by reviewing! Thank you!

And I'm incredibly sorry for the awkward scene change. I forgot to make sure the line break was there! Thank you, SKJ-H for pointing that out!


	3. When Dean Found Out How to Save Sam

_Author's Note:_ Please enjoy and review this longer part! You can see it as a make-up for my previously short chapters and my mess up on the line breaks in Part II. This one is actually my favorite so far, but be **warned** there is quite a bit of **cursing** in this one. The next part should be the last!

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**Inevitability, Part III: When Dean Found Out How to Save Sam**

*Much later, near the end of season four*

First POV, Dean

Honestly, if I had any other way to find out, it wouldn't be like how it is going down. I personally would prefer a demon to blab it to Sam and me just to distract us for a bit… or for a hunt to go renegade with me seriously hurt and Sam jump me for my blood while trying to patch me up… Yeah, that's more bearable, believe me. I suppose it's because both of us would know and wouldn't have to hide anything from each other… Hell, who am I kidding? I would have VERY much liked for Sam to know and suddenly break with the pressure or urge to get my blood. At least he is good with the whole "letting it all out" crap. As for me… well…

Anyway, none of those things are happening. We are on a hunt, that much is true. And yeah, one of us is in huge trouble, but it isn't me. AND it's not like I can even reach Sam. I'm currently held up to the wall by some fucking powerful witch that has a very knocked out, bloody Sam tied to the table with some cords. This is one of those very helpless situations that I REALLY hate.

The stupid hag walks up to me all creepy-like. She was NOT hot **at all**… Maybe she was when the Stonehenge was created but not right now with her skin that really should have already dropped off. I wish I just pretended to still be passed out, but I couldn't shut my eyes on Sam. I had to know what was going on. The witch starts blabbing, and I really try to not cringe away from her strong incense and microwaved cat scent.

"I don't want to hurt you or your brother. I want to help," she croaks.

Really? Help? Why don't you start by taking me down and letting me take Sammy home?

But I kept my mouth shut. However my raised left eyebrow speaks volumes.

She chuckles and I see that her teeth aren't all there and some of the gum is colored deep dirt black... Almost like tar. Fuck! Could she put her glamour back on? She looked so good in the bar. I should have known witches were all horrible, inside and out. Yeah, I knew she was a witch; both Sam and I knew after the second time I talked to her. The first time involved a few kisses, and I could really just throw up at that fact. Fuck! I kissed this super ugly, ancient hag! My face twists at the thought that I was so close to sleeping with her. Luckily, I was watching over Sam because this whole Ruby and demon blood thing has to stop, so I just left with Sam. Thankfully a few chosen words on her part the second time raised my hunter radar. Witches all have some weird too nice yet subtly knowing act.

I notice she is just staring openly at me like as if she is waiting for my mind to stop and focus on the moment at hand… which isn't a bad idea, so I do. She immediately starts talking again like she knew I was focusing again. Fucking weird.

"I do want to help whether you believe me or not. I understand that you have been looking for a, let's say, counter to demon blood? Some spell or anything that could make your brother stop?"

I just look at her because seriously do I really have to answer that question?

All of a sudden her calmness disappears and she becomes a bit distraught. A silver knife appears from her multicolored layered shawls that make her look like a deflated peacock. She looks back and forth between the knife and me, and I knew what was coming so I braced myself for... I didn't feel a damn thing. There was a clearly trail of blood flowing down my left arm, but the cut was smooth. Clearly this lady was a professional… and given the lack of pain maybe she was a good witch. I almost laughed when I imagined her in the Wizard of Oz movie.

She pulls a thin but tall glass from some part of her shawls and collected the blood. Miraculously, none of it fell on the floor. It was just like magic, I snorted internally. So what? Was she going to use my blood for some ritual? Opening a seal? Drink it? Have me drink my own blood?!

Suddenly she glances up at my face and stands straighter. She smiles a little crookedly and leans a little closer.

"This isn't for you, dear."

Damn. Her breath smells like… Wait.

Being a little off-guard by her putrid breath, I didn't fully register what she meant until I couldn't even convince her to stop. My blood has stopped draining out of me by some spell, I'm sure, but it feels like my heart stops beating for a bit. Sam…

She hovers over him with the glass in her left hand and waves once over his face with her right. He wakes up dazed, no doubt from the blood loss, and moans pitifully.

"Dean…" he rasps out.

"Sam, don't – "

It isn't until now that I realized I couldn't talk. What the hell? I try to make myself noticeable to Sam by moving somehow, but it doesn't work. It's like I am paralyzed except with my face. Fuck.

Sam begins to squirm under his restraints. He starts to gasp painfully and suddenly his back arches. He screams so much that his face and neck turns almost burgundy. His arms are stretched and the veins are prominently seen. Just as suddenly, Sam fell back and was gasping for breath. His body seemed to be twitching from whatever pain he was feeling. I feel absolutely helpless to get to him.

"His body has been tainted with demon blood; I know you know that. When severely hurt, the demon blood tries to replenish in fast quantities so as not to be overrun with new fresh human blood. It has a peculiar effect on the body and mind. Most likely, he is in great pain and suffering the worst and most agonizing events in his life simultaneously along with brutal pain that he has never felt before, body and soul. It is too much sometimes for a human to handle. That is what he is experiencing now. Did you know?"

Thanks for the demonic biology lesson, you fucking psycho! Now let him go! Leave him alone!

She shakes her head minutely almost sadly.

"I'm sorry, but this has to be done before the demon and human blood can be fully replenished."

She moves Sam's head towards her with her right hand and poured my blood down his throat while rubbing his throat to swallow. It wasn't much but still… I'm sure not hygienic, but that's just gross.

Sam becomes quiet after a while, and his body seems lax. The hag releases Sam from the restraints then. I was so gonna beat this witch's ass after I got down if she killed… And then, I know that this may not make sense, but Sam was Sam, if even only by a bit.

The pain had seemed to triple and his throat would surely be sore in the morning, but a golden light appears from Sam's mouth. It begins to move down his throat to his stomach and then the rest of his body. It is so surreal and beautiful that I can't think for a bit. A calmness surrounds him that I just can't explain, and it spreads from him to me. I can see the golden light reach out to me, and I accept it. It is the best I have ever felt since getting back from Hell or ever.

I feel truly connected to Sam and feel his pain yet I can somehow sooth it. The dark spots on the outer part of his soul (yes, it's Sam's soul, I'm sure) begin to lighten until they disappear with my presence. I delve deeper inside to find the main cause of Sam's hurt which I can tell is practically withering Sam's strength; it's like it wants to take him over. Finally I see, or rather, I feel it quite prominently. A black force seems to center him, and I try to get to it; I want to heal Sam completely. I just need him to be okay. Before I can get to it, the connection is sharply cut off, and it feels like whiplash.

No! I have to get back! I have to… To do what? What was I doing?

"Did you see it? Could you see how cracked and damaged your brother's soul has become? Oh yes, there is goodness, but the demon blood has corrupted the core. You can save him, Dean, and now you know how. You only have to do this one more time, Dean. Just one. If you're too late however, Lucifer will get him, and you'll lose your brother forever."

I look at her sharply, not for hate towards her but the chance of Sam losing himself. And what the hell does the Devil have to do with all of this? What does she mean by that?

So my blood can… cure Sam?

Sam made a soft sound that I couldn't really distinguish.

She smiled. _You already know the answer, Dean. However, the answer to your first question is –_

I am a little startled to hear her in my mind, and was waiting for her to continue, but she suddenly fell to the ground. I am almost instantly dropped unceremoniously to the floor on my feet.

"Shit!"

Damn, my ankles hurt like a bitch, but I just try to think past that pain. I can deal with that later. At least I can talk now.

I glance apprehensively at the still body of the witch and can tell that she was dead. Somehow I know that it was because this little mission of hers took more out of her than she could have thought… either that or some people in Hell don't appreciate her helping the Winchesters out. On that note, I think I should just get Sam and me out of here. If they knew she was here with them, then it wouldn't be too long that they will come after us. I just hope Castiel's internal tattoos will keep them off of our tracks for a while.

I drag Sam down from the bloodied table that he was on and am surprised by how light he is. What the hell happened to Sam? Was it the blood draining that caused that or have I just not been paying attention enough to my brother?

Sam coughs roughly and his body starts to shiver. Okay. I will just have to think later. Now I just need to get Sam out of here.

I heft him up into my arms with a little struggle and adrenaline carries me to the Impala. I practically slam on the gas with Sam's head in my lap. I know it's a little weird, but I couldn't put him in the back seat, not when Sam and I were so connected a little bit ago. I need to make sure that he was okay.

We got to a little nicer motel than usual after a few days of driving. Sam hadn't woken up yet, and I never took him to a doctor. For some reason, I already knew that he was healing with my blood and would be up in no time.

When I placed him on one of the beds, he felt a little heavier. His face was fuller, and his skin had a healthy tone to it. Despite that, I still watched him at night. He would start to literally cry and all I had to do was grab hold of his hand and it would stop. His body would unconsciously roll in my seated direction and a smile would tug at his lips. These are the times that I felt like I was really with Sam; he was my little brother, and I was taking care of him. It made me genuinely happy.

When Sam wakes up, I just hope that this can continue even though I honestly know that it won't.

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_Author's Note:_ Did anyone else see the connections between this chapter and the last episode? It's kind of freaky. Hehe. In fact, the next chapter seems to almost predict the last two episodes of season 5 somehow, which is freakier. *shrugs*


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